I, ________________________, do solemnly swear to uphold the principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word that I shall strictly adhere to the following:
I will complain about the destruction of 1st Amendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 1st Amendment Rights.
I will complain about the destruction of my 2nd Amendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 2nd Amendment rights by legally but brazenly brandishing unconcealed firearms in public.
I will foreswear the time-honored principles of fairness, decency, and respect by screaming unintelligible platitudes regarding tyranny, Nazi-ism, and socialism at public town halls.
I pledge to eliminate all government intervention in my life. I will abstain from the use of and participation in any socialist goods and services including but not limited to the following:
If a veteran of the government-run socialist US military, I will forego my VA benefits and insist on paying for my own medical care
- Social Security
- Medicare/Medicaid
- State Children’s Health Insurance Programs (SCHIP)
- Police, Fire, and Emergency Services
- US Postal Service
- Roads and Highways
- Air Travel (regulated by the socialist FAA)
- The US Railway System
- Public Subways and Metro Systems
- Public Bus and Lightrail Systems
- Rest Areas on Highways
- Sidewalks
- All Government-Funded Local/State Projects (e.g., see Iowa 2009 federal senate appropriations)
- Public Water and Sewer Services (goodbye socialist toilet, shower, dishwasher, kitchen sink, outdoor hose!)
- Public and State Universities and Colleges
- Public Primary and Secondary Schools
- Sesame Street
- Publicly Funded Anti-Drug Use Education for Children
- Public Museums
- Libraries
- Public Parks and Beaches
- State and National Parks
- Public Zoos
- Unemployment Insurance
- Municipal Garbage and Recycling Services
- Treatment at Any Hospital or Clinic That Ever Received Funding From Local, State or Federal Government (pretty much all of them)
- Medical Services and Medications That Were Created or Derived From Any Government Grant or Research Funding (again, pretty much all of them)
- Socialist Byproducts of Government Investment Such as Duct Tape and Velcro (Nazi-NASA Inventions)
- Use of the Internets, email, and networked computers, as the DoD's ARPANET was the basis for subsequent computer networking
- Foodstuffs, Meats, Produce and Crops That Were Grown With, Fed With, Raised With or That Contain Inputs From Crops Grown With Government Subsidies
- Clothing Made from Crops (e.g. cotton) That Were Grown With or That Contain Inputs From Government Subsidies
I will not tour socialist government buildings like the Capitol in Washington, D.C.
I pledge to never take myself, my family, or my children on a tour of the following types of socialist locations, including but not limited to:
I will urge my Member of Congress and Senators to forego their government salary and government-provided healthcare.
- Smithsonian Museums such as the Air and Space Museum or Museum of American History
- The socialist Washington, Lincoln, and Jefferson Monuments
- The government-operated Statue of Liberty
- The Grand Canyon
- The socialist World War II and Vietnam Veterans Memorials
- The government-run socialist-propaganda location known as Arlington National Cemetery
- All other public-funded socialist sites, whether it be in my state or in Washington, DC
I will oppose and condemn the government-funded and therefore socialist military of the United States of America.
I will boycott the products of socialist defense contractors such as GE, Lockheed-Martin, Boeing, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics, Raytheon, Humana, FedEx, General Motors, Honeywell, and hundreds of others that are paid by our socialist government to produce goods for our socialist army.
I will protest socialist security departments such as the Pentagon, FBI, CIA, Department of Homeland Security, TSA, Department of Justice and their socialist employees.
Upon reaching eligible retirement age, I will tear up my socialist Social Security checks.
Upon reaching age 65, I will forego Medicare and pay for my own private health insurance until I die.
SWORN ON A BIBLE AND SIGNED THIS DAY OF __________ IN THE YEAR ___.
_____________ _________________________
Signed Printed Name/Town and State
November 20: Fox News institutes a "zero tolerance" policy for on-screen errors after a rash of mistakes and apologies. An internal memo about the new policy: "That means we will start by going to air with only the most essential, basic, and manageable elements......It is more important to get it right, than it is to get it on.' We may then build up again slowly as deadlines and workloads allow so that we can be sure we can quality check everything before it makes air, and we never having to explain, retract, qualify or apologize again." Seems like that may go against their entire business model...
November 18: Fox uses footage from 2008 McCain-Palin campaign rallies when describing the huge crowds at a Palin book tour event. Michael Clemente, senior vice president of news at Fox, explains the mistake: "This was a production error in which the copy editor changed a script and didn't alert the control room to update the video. There will be an on-air explanation during Happening Now on Thursday." Fox News later apologizes for the error.
November 10: On The Daily Show, host Jon Stewart points out that Fox News' Sean Hannity used footage of the 9/12 rallies in D.C. when describing the crowd size at Michele Bachmann's Capitol Hill Tea Party, in an apparent effort to inflate numbers at the much smaller Bachmann rally. Hannity later apologizes for the error.
October 31: During its coverage of the NY-23 special election, Fox repeats the erroneous claim that moderate Republican nominee Dede Scozzafava -- who dropped out of the race -- had thrown her weight behind Conservative Party candidate Doug Hoffman. In fact, Scozzafava endorsed Democrat Bill Owens, after her campaign was undermined by national conservatives who criticized her for being pro-choice and pro-gay marriage. Watch Fox News repeat the mistake, to hilarious effect, here.
March 16: Martha MacCallum misleads Live Desk viewers in a segment about the economy: "After weeks of economic doom and gloom, the Obama administration is now singing a slightly different tune. Take a look at what was said in recent interviews this weekend." Fox then airs a reel of Obama Administration officials supposedly talking positively about the economy, including a clip of Joe Biden claiming that "the fundamentals of the economy are strong." Only problem? This clip was actually from a 2008 campaign event, during which Biden criticized John McCain for his statement that "the fundamentals of the economy are strong" after the financial market collapsed. Fox conveniently failed to provide that bit of context when editing its segment.
June 24: Republican Mark Sanford holds his infamous tearful press conference, confessing to an affair with an Argentinian woman after disappearing from his state for several days. Fox News airs the press conference with the chryon "SC Gov Mark Sanford (D)." Trace Gallagher later apologizes for the error.
November 23: So where are they now? Well, apparently Martha MacCallum didn't get the memo, breaking the Fox News purity pledge after only three days by telling viewers a public option would be funded by taxpayers: "The reason that the public option is so controversial is, it's a government-run health option. So if you can't get health care anywhere else, this is the idea, that you could get it from this government-offered plan, which of course would be paid for by the taxpayers."
Meatless Monday is a non-profit initiative of The Monday Campaigns, in association with the Johns Hopkins’ Bloomberg School of Public Health. Our goal is to help reduce meat consumption 15% in order to improve personal health and the health of our planet.
